10 Things Allies Can Do
What does it mean to be an ally and why is it important?
This topic we're discussing is challenging.
We're looking at how our behaviour and actions might hurt other people, and this can be really difficult for how we view ourselves. When you first learn about these ideas, you could experience a range of powerful emotions including: sadness, guilt, and rage - all of which are common.
Even if it's challenging, we can't emphasize enough how important it is to understand. If we don't, we run the risk of maintaining unfair structures that affect both ourselves and disadvantaged populations. Systems that we may continue to support, even if we are not aware of it. Take your time thinking about this and don't worry about getting it right immediately. Being a good ally takes time to develop.
What is an ally?
An ‘ally’ is someone who has privilege, but chooses to stand for and with ‘marginalized communities’ by taking tangible, ongoing actions to dismantle systems of oppression. They grow close to that group and keep in mind that they are only there to provide assistance. They know when to stand back and when to step up, never hogging the limelight.
Allies are also not saviours because they are confident in the ability of the people they are helping to succeed. They advocate for that group's needs and utilize their influence to raise that group's voice. An ally is someone who fights ignorance within their own group or groups and encourages others to join them as allies.
What are marginalized communities?
Marginalized communities are those who are targeted by oppression, including but not limited to: people of colour, people of different religions, immigrants, refugees, the LGTBQ+ community, the Indigenous community, women, and people with disabilities.
People who are marginalized are those who are pushed to the margins of society by dominant groups. They are forced into this position against their consent. It is brought on by institutionalized discrimination meant to maintain the dominance of one group. They are up against numerous barriers that have been put in place on purpose to hold them back.
People that are marginalized have fewer resources, rights, and opportunities available to them. They regularly deal with privilege, exploitation, and discrimination. Some people experience marginalization on multiple levels. It is an ally's responsibility to assist them in tearing down these systems of abuse, violence, and prejudice.
Being an ally is not a literal status you can achieve.
It's more of a dedication to a way of life that we should always pursue. It is a continuous process of education, listening, and introspection. Nobody is going to be an expert at it. People still experience fundamental injustices and discrimination today. We must continuously adapt if we want to deal with them effectively.
Now we’re ready to talk about how to be a genuine ally. Here are some general things to keep in mind. Remember that every group and individual you meet will have their own preferences which you need to find out.
1. Listen.
Listen to what marginalized people are saying.
There’s a lot you should find out and it is not the responsibility of the community to educate you about it. If you find people in that community offering to educate others without being asked, be sure to take them up on that and listen to their stories.
Whether it’s through face-to-face interactions, on your social media feed or in the articles you read, listen to what marginalized people and communities are saying. But, remember… it’s not about you, your feelings or opinions; it’s about hearing theirs.
2. Get educated.
‘The more you know, the more you grow.’
Before you engage with the community gain some knowledge first. Seek out books, articles, films, etc., about the history and current issues facing marginalized communities. You can also seek out anti-oppression authors, influencers, organizations, etc., to learn as much as you can.
Think about…
What issues are they facing?
How did these issues come about?
How can you show cultural sensitivity?
What are the protocols, language and terminology in the community you should be aware of?
Who are the local leaders in that community?
3. Get involved.
It’s time to participate.
You must first consider how extensive you want your allyship to be. Look for local groups within your community working for social justice. Start by following them on social media, subscribe to their email lists, and show up by promoting or supporting their work.This is acceptable as long as you are not misrepresenting them. Increase the impact of the community's messages by sharing them. Verify the accuracy of the information you are sharing.
4. Show up.
Make your presence known.
Attending events and providing the community with support in person is a more direct way to be an ally. Keep an eye out for calls for assistance and be present when they come in. It might appear at gatherings like marches and protests. It might get in touch with elected officials to deliver messages from that community. Follow their lead and avoid making the request about you, no matter what it is. When someone from a marginalized community invites you to an event, go - be there to listen, learn and show your support.
5. Speak up.
Use your voice for others.
When a family member, friend, co-worker or stranger says something hateful or ignorant, call them out on it. Silence allows oppression to continue. Again, remember this is just a start. Being an ally is an ongoing process of education, understanding and action. A genuine ally understands they will never quite reach it, that it is always something to strive for.
6. Intervene.
But always seek consent for your activities.
When someone is being targeted – physically or verbally – intervene only with their permission. Focus on supporting them rather than engaging the aggressor. This is not a one time thing, you need to be doing it every time. If it isn’t obvious if they need the support of an ally, ask them. If they say no, then respect that and step back.
7. Welcome discomfort.
This isn’t going to be easy.
When you encounter something that makes you uncomfortable, don’t dismiss it. Sit with it, ask yourself ‘why?’ and welcome it as an opportunity to grow.
8. Learn from your mistakes.
Give yourself a break.
You will make mistakes. When someone calls you out, don’t get defensive. Listen, apologize and change your behaviour going forward. . Take all the time you need to process the information and then try to learn more. Start with making changes in your own life to reduce the impact of unearned privilege. Then when you are feeling more confident start getting out there and support others.
9. Stay engaged.
This isn’t a sprint.
Even when the work gets difficult, stay engaged. Remember that these communities lack the convenience of being able to turn off. Oppression is constant, and marginalized people do not have the privilege to ignore it. They are constantly dealing with the aftereffects of trauma and tyranny. They are also connected to numerous people going through similar things.
The community you support should benefit from your involvement in a positive or neutral way, not negatively. How can you guarantee that occurs? Don't show up in support without any supplies. What tools, talents, or labour can you offer? Do you use their resources without returning anything?
10. Donate what you can.
Commit to support a local organization doing social work in your community either with your time or money; not just once but on an ongoing basis.
It's not simple, but then again, neither is always being under oppression. When you're feeling stressed out or unclear of what to do, never forget that. Building strong friendships and relationships takes time. Therefore, wait before starting and pay close attention to what you are doing. You can start with just that. It will get simpler as your confidence increases. By doing this, you will contribute to the overthrow of these oppressive systems.
As individuals, it is our job to be true allies.
Only we have the ability to discover it within ourselves. Instead of doing things to receive accolades, check off boxes, or in a token gesture, we do it to genuinely destroy unfair systems. Additionally, we're not just acting in favour of the affected parties. Our own ability to live in a free and fair society is hampered by these structures. We all gain when those power disparities are eliminated.
Seeking to be an ally is an ongoing journey, and this list simply represents a starting point. Please refer to the following sources which informed this list, and continue to seek out and practice ways that you can be an ally.
Whatever it is, we’re here for you.
Life is uncertain. Jobs are stressful. Parenting is hard. Relationships take work. Families can be dysfunctional. And sometimes, love hurts. When you’re confronted by feelings, events, or issues that are making your life challenging, it’s okay to ask for some help.
